A Can Do Mom

 A lot of people want to believe that grief follows a neat timeline. That after a year, or five, or ten, the pain just disappears. But the truth is, grief isn’t something you finish. It changes over time, but it never truly ends. When we lose someone we love, that love doesn’t vanish with them. It stays here with us, which means the grief stays too, in different forms. Sometimes it’s a quiet ache in the background. Other times, it can hit all at once, sharp and unexpected, like it just happened yesterday. At least, that’s how it’s been for me and for some of my family. Almost 8 years ago, my dad passed away. But if I’m being honest, my grieving started long before that. He had health issues for years, and there were several times we thought we were going to lose him. Once, we even said our goodbyes. He was ready, but he knew I wasn’t, so we had a long conversation about death and what it meant to him. That talk is one I’ll always hold close. He wasn’t afraid of dying. He didn’t w...

I haven’t written a letter from the heart since January 1st. That’s because on January 11th, I had what I thought was a heart attack. Since this month is American Heart Month, I wanted to share what happened. In the days before the 11th, I hadn’t been feeling great. But I’m almost 50, so I thought it was just getting older, perimenopause, and some muscle pain. We also had a heavy snowfall on the 8th and I spent time outside dealing with that. So by Saturday, it seemed natural that I was feeling worse. The morning of the 11th I woke feeling drained. My left shoulder hurt, reaching up into my neck, and overall I just did not feel well. But I got on with my work. After lunch, I still felt off so I sat down at my computer to relax. Then I began to feel worse. At first, I did not think too much of it until my chest felt squeezed, almost like a corset tightening. Then the pain in my shoulder spread down my left arm, numb and burning. Heat exploded into my head and my heart pounded wildly....

As a mom who’s been through the whirlwind of Christmas with young kids, I want to take a few minutes to share a little piece of advice with all the younger moms out there… Enjoy this time while your kids are still young. I know the holidays can feel like a blur of stress, shopping, and trying to make everything perfect. But I promise you—this season will go by much quicker than you think. And one day, you’ll look back and wish you had slowed down and savored more of the little moments. I know firsthand how overwhelming it can be. The pressure to get the right gifts, the chaos of decorating, and the endless to-do lists can make it seem like there’s no time to just relax and enjoy your family. But the truth is, those to-do lists won’t matter in the long run. What your children will remember most isn’t the perfectly decorated house or the perfectly cooked meal—it’s the love and time you shared with them. One thing I learned over the years was to include my children in as many of the ...

Holidays can be so hard sometimes. And honestly, a lot of the time, it’s the people we love most that make them the hardest. I know that sounds kind of harsh, but it’s true. I’ve always loved the holidays. When I became a mom, I couldn’t wait to celebrate with my kids. I had all these ideas in my head of little traditions we’d start and build on as our own little family. But things didn’t exactly go the way I pictured. The first three years of our marriage were… a lot. Both our parents lived close enough that we could see them for every holiday, so we tried to split things up—Thanksgiving with one side, Christmas with the other, and then swap the next year. We thought that was fair. Our parents? Not so much. My mother-in-law felt like all the holidays should be at her house. Thanksgiving dinner at noon, and we were “supposed” to spend the night on Christmas Eve. That didn’t leave much for my family. And honestly, we were already trying to be there for Christmas anyway, because it ...

Normally, I try to keep this blog focused on helpful tips and tricks — little ways to make life as a mother just a bit easier. Whether it is routines, parenting hacks, or encouraging words, I do my best to keep things positive, practical, and uplifting. But the truth is, life is not always easy. And I have come to realize that pretending otherwise does not help anyone, including myself. Sometimes the most powerful thing we can do for each other is to say, “Me too,” and walk through the hard things together. So I have decided to start a new section of the blog called "Letters from the Heart." It is going to be a space where I open up a little more, a place for me to share my honest thoughts, my struggles, and what is really going on beneath the surface. Not just as a mom, but as a woman, a wife, a daughter, and someone navigating middle age with all the joys and heartbreaks that come with it. This is not easy for me. I am a private person by nature, and putting myself out ...